My Journey

 In asking you to open up to me and share your concerns, hopes and dreams, I feel it’s only fair that you know a little of my journey through life.  In our sessions it will be all about you but in my sharing of some of the major life events and struggles I have navigated along the way, I hope that you know I can relate to some your own challenges and I have learnt not just the practice of counselling but have a depth of understanding and life experience to back it up. 

I was the fourth of five daughters and grew up on a farm in England. We moved to the Isle of Man when I was nine and I missed our big old farmhouse which was built in the 1600’s and instead we moved into a new bungalow. My parents had a rough patch at this time, both financially and personally and I would escape and immerse myself in the beauty of the Island. I walked and cycled for miles and had many wonderful adventures.

As I reached my teens, I had a number of major events occur, which combined with teenage hormones, plummeted me into depression. I developed body dysmorphia and became bulimic. I had been working since I was thirteen part time and after leaving school worked in the Bureau of Statistics. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life but I knew that my current job was not my chosen career. One miserable day, with rain pouring down, I took shelter in a travel agents' doorway and the stark contrast of a poster of the Great Barrier Reef, with its sunshine and palm trees, triggered my desire to travel there. I booked a flight to Australia and arranged a working visa and a few months later boarded a plane. 

I spent an amazing year back packing around Australia and it was a fabulous adventure and a journey of self-discovery and healing. As happens, I met an Australian who would later become my husband. I returned to the Isle of Man and he followed. We travelled Europe, got engaged, pregnant and married within twelve months and returned to Australia. We initially arrived in South Australia, seven months pregnant, but the promised job did not work out, so at eight months pregnant we bought a panel van and drove across the Nullarbor Plain and returned to my husband’s home town in WA, that he had left ten years before. We had $300 and lived in his sister’s caravan on her front lawn. We briefly moved into a rental with his brother, with a mattress and suitcases but discovered the house was going on the market. I had my first daughter at 42 weeks pregnant after a difficult birth. My husband also had pains which everyone thought was amusing until it was discovered he had to have his appendix removed. I left hospital with my new baby, he stayed in. I had no family, no friends, no house, no furniture and no money. I had no idea what to do with a baby and felt entirely lost. My sister in law, who had only recently met me, kindly let us stay with her. When my husband got out of hospital, we found another house to rent and he fortunately secured a job. We both loved to make a house lovely and therefore our rentals kept going on the market, so we moved house five times in those first few years.

We had two more daughters and a son, so had four children in seven years. I worked part time and life was busy. I began to study landscape design as gardening was a passion but gardening in Australia was very different from England, so I had much to learn. I also started exploring investing in property, so before long, with my handyman husband, we began to build and renovate properties. I discovered I loved this process and as a technical assistant to my husband, I learned to pave, landscape, paint, tile and use a drill! We worked extremely hard and as the kids started school, I started looking for a career and discovered real estate, this combined my passion for people with property. I had found my place and quickly established myself as a known and respected agent. 

After a few years the pressure of working seven days a week, combined with running a household, renovating and raising four children with little support, eventually took its toll on our marriage and after a complicated and extremely painful break up, we divorced. We were married for twenty years and I am grateful for everything I experienced through our marriage, although our family was shattered and ripples were felt for many years. In hindsight, I learnt so much about myself through this and began to realize I was a wife, mother, employee but I did not really know who I was, as everyone else came first. I began to do a lot of personal development and I was successful on the career front but still had problems trying to establish a work/ life balance. Sacrifices were and had been made.

Five years after my separation I remarried and time has helped heal our blended family of eight children.

At fifty-one menopause hit me like a truck and I discovered that it was impossible to work at the level I had been doing for so many years, I became aware this taboo subject really was the “change of life” and no one really talked about it or prepared you for it. Some women sail through it but not me! Also, during this time one of my children had their own major battle to fight and I discovered stress, worry and menopause are not a good mix. I dropped back to working remotely from home, which was a great move but was rather isolating. It was also a huge learning curve as I had to learn to do work that a number of staff had done for me prior. I embraced the challenge and evolved one skill at a time. 

After experiencing the grief of losing my father I decided I wanted to change careers. I loved helping people and hearing their stories and helping them solve the problems they faced. Most people who sell a home do so for a reason: divorce, death, financial issues, downsizing or upsizing and I loved helping them navigate these life changes. For several years I had considered studying counselling and I finally committed to it and stepped away from real estate after 22 years.

Having gained my qualifications in counselling, I also decided to study life coaching, as my passion is to help guide people in making positive choices and have clarity on their chosen path forward. We can heal from the past but we can not rewrite our story. We do however, have the ability to change our future and create our best life. Hence the name of my Practice became Counselling Clarity.

I am sure you understand this is a very compressed version of my story and it is remembered and told from my own perspective. In reflecting on my journey, I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the experiences that have shaped me. Each challenge has taught me invaluable lessons, and every connection I've made along the way has enriched my life. I am thankful for the support I received during difficult times and for the strength I found within myself. It is this gratitude that fuels my desire to help others on their own paths, reminding me that we all have the power to transform our lives.

Now you know me a little better, I hope you feel more confident reaching out and working with me in healing your past and creating your best life. I am here to help when you are ready.

Jennifer